Animated gif of two brothers sitting on a couch wearing holiday sweaters and Santa hats.

It's the most awful time of the year

Awkward Holiday Minisessions

in xenia and dayton, oh

Blank stares? Stiff smiles? Disembodied heads floating in the void? It's the anti-Christmas card you didn't know you've been waiting for.

Put the "cringe" back in Christmas, the "ugh" back in Hanukkah, the "uneasy facade" back in Feliz Navidad.

You're not a normal family. Why would you want normal family photos?

For a limited time only, book your own Olan Mills-style holiday portraits.

Olan Mills style portrait of two brothers with floating heads separate from the main photo of them sitting on a couch high-fiving.

Your dissatisfaction guaranteed, or your money back.

Olan Mills style family portrait of parents and children's individual faces.

These Awkward Holiday Minisessions include a 30 minute photoshoot, designed for up to 5 animate beings, held in the embarrassment of your own home. You'll receive 1 professionally butchered, high resolution image for you to inflict upon your friends and loved ones however your weird little heart desires.

Hit the link below to book your Awkward Holiday Mini for the lamentable price of $85 (additional mileage fees may apply).

Olan Mills style portrait of a father's floating head with the rest of the family shown from the shoulders up.

Dui Purus, Eleifend Sit Blandit Odio. Eget Aliquet Felis, Odio Arcu Sit Gravida Ligula. because nothing says awkward like lorem ipsum you forgot to remove.

SHUT UP & TAKE MY MONEY

Josh, a recently disgruntled client, said it best:

"Thanks for the awkward lil couch Christmas sweater shoot. There was laughter, there were tears, and most of all a disturbing amount of brotherly holiday weirdness that we will now unleash on the masses."

Capture Those Cringeworthy Memories Today

Contact me, your devoted photographer, to design your ultimate Olan Mills-style experience. You know you want it.